1. (This is the most popular question we receive.) Why is your criterion so unflexable and so black and white? Why cannot there be some exceptions to the rule?

There are three reasons we know of why there should be no exception to the basic rule that we should be unselfish and pro-society in our decisions and actions that impact others instead of being selfish, permissive and pro-choice.

Desensitization - The spread of selfishness, permissiveness and the pro-choice attitude is interconnected by a process called desensitization. People who are selfish, permissive and pro-choice in one area are statistically more likely to be selfish, permissive and pro-choice in other areas. When we are selfish, permissive and pro-choice in our actions, we are sending a message to the people around us that it is OK for them to be selfish, permissive and pro-choice in their actions and decisions that impact other people.

Cooperation and pulling together - One definition of society is a group of people working together for common goals. If we are selfish, permissive and pro-choice, we are not pulling together and are heading in different directions for different goals. What if four horses pulling a wagon decided to head in different directions? One goes north, the second goes south, a third goes east and the last goes west. Instead of pulling the wagon towards a goal, the wagon does not move and quite possibly gets damaged. Our society gets damaged when we do not pull in the same direction.

Criterion - It iwould be impossible to find a workable criterion for exceptions to the basic rule. If you allowed exceptions, what would be your criterion for when you should be unselfish and pro-society and when you could be allowed to be selfish, permissive and pro-choice? Would you allow people to be selifsh and pro-choice on Tuesdays and Thursdays? Possibly, you would allow people to selfish and pro-choice in actions and decisions that start with the letters A through M?

2. What is "Cafeteria Morals" and how does it enter into this?

The traditional definition for Cafeteria Morals is the process by which an individual uses different criteria for determining right and wrong like selectiing different dishes from different shelves at a cafeteria. There really are only two criteria for right and wrong: either you are unselfish and pro-society in your actions and decisions that affect other people or you are selfish, permissive and pro-choice.

What typically happens with Cafeteria Morals, is that the person committing the action or making the decision first decides on the answer they want to hear - either "yes you can do that" or "no you cannot do that" - and then selects the appropriate criterion to give them the appropriate answer. When you select the selfish, permissive and pro-choice criterion and base your decision of right and wrong on the person committing the action, you can almost always justify your action. However, when you select the unselfish and pro-society criterion and base your decision of right and wrong on the negative impact on other people or society, then you often find that the action should be prohibited or classed as "wrong."

An obvious example is a mother who decides to help her family by setting up a small business while her kids are in school. Looking at this from the standpoint of the person making the decision it sounds like something "right" and "good" because she is helping her family. However, when you find out that her small business is selling drugs to kids at a junior high school, then you will judge her actions based on the impact on other people and society.

3. Do you find many people who oppose your point of view?

No. Our goal is to help people understand that both statistics as well as logic show us that our society, our world and all of us would be better off if we work together and go our of our way to be unselfish and pro-society rather than harm others. The opposing point of view would be to suggest that our society, our world and all of us would be better off if we are selfish, avoid working together and go our of our way to harm others. We have yet to hear from anyone who takes that opposing position. Typically, the liberal and permissive position is to ignore what is best for society rather than take a stand.

4. Why do you use the term "pro-choice" for actions and decisions beyond abortion?

Because it is appropriate. There are only two criteria for right and wrong. Either you are unselfish and pro-society in your actions and decisions and base your decision of right on wrong on the impact of your action on other people and society, or you are selfish, permissive and pro-choice and do what you want to do regardless of who gets harmed.

"Pro-choice" means a decision or action where the individual does not take the impact on others or society into consideration but instead does what they want regardless of who gets harmed. Hence, people can be pro-choice about selling drugs to kids, they can be pro-choice about murder, and they can be pro-choice about essentially any decision that could impact other people and socieity.

5. You seem to leave very little room for the acceptance of differences or diversity.

There several different kinds of differences and diversity. Differences that people have no control over, such as race, nationality and being born with a handicap do not present a problem and are easily accepted. In addition, decisions and differences that do not impact others are also not a problem. The one place that makes a difference is in your criterion for right and wrong.

Again, we can talk about the four horses pulling the wagon. If all four horses pull the wagon in the same direction, then society makes some progress. However, if each of the horses wants to exercise their differences and diversity and pull in four different directions, then the wagon not only makes no progress but can easily be damaged.

If you think there should be more diversity, then give us your thought in diversity in allowing murder, diversity in allowing the sale of drugs to kids, and diversity in harming others. Logic dictates that there can be no diversity in harming others.

6. What about personal decisions? What decisions are exempt from being judged right and wrong?

All of our decisions are personal decisions because no one makes them but us and no one is responsible for them but us. The decisions that are exempt from being judged right or wrong are decisions that do not impact others or things over which we have no control.

If "personal" decisions are exempt from being right or wrong, then what do you do about people who decide that selling drugs to kids or mudering people of a different race or religion are "personal" decisions?

7. Can I use the written material on Unselfish.org for my own articles, books, monographs, church bulletins, and presentations?

There may be limitations on the illustrations so we cannot give you permission to use them. However, all of the written material is avilable for your use, including commercial publication, without charge. Giving us credit and sending us a copy would be nice but is not necessary.

8. What can I do to make our society less selfish and permissive?

One of the major reasons why our society has become more selfish and permissive is because it has been desensitized to right and wrong by liberal influences including the main stream media. One of the best ways to reduce selfishness and permissiveness is to reverse this process by sensitizing others to right and wrong. To do this you simply need to get people to talk about right and wrong and their criterion for right and wrong.

Most people will agree that being unselfish and pro-society in actions and decisions is "right" and better for soeiety. Most well-intentioned people do not make a decision to intentinally be selfish and permissive, nor do they feel they have a right to harm others. More typical is that they ignore right and wrong and become amoral. Hence, getting people to talk about right, and wrong and getting them to talk about making a decision on their criterion for right and wrong, sensitizes them to right and wrong and makes them think about these decisions.

We are in the process of adding more questions and answers. Please feel free to submit your questions via e-mail.
  

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